I’m walking down the street in the middle of the day.
STRANGER: Excuse me, sir. May I speak with you for a moment?
ME: Whoa, you scared me!
STRANGER: I’d like to give you $1,000.
ME: Sick! I could totally use that.
STRANGER: I can tell.
ME: A thousand bucks, wow! Rock! Wait a second…there isn’t some sort of catch, is there?
STRANGER: There’s a catch.
ME: God damnit!
STRANGER: It’s not a big one. The only thing you have to do is agree that you’ll never see this one movie.
ME: Oh, thank god! I thought I was going to have to join Jews for Jesus or someting. Not seeing a movie is so easy! Most movies suck.
STRANGER: Agreed. So you’ll do it?
ME: Sure.
(He starts to hand me the money).
ME: Wait. Can I just see the trailer to make sure?
(Pause)
STRANGER: OK. But remember: a thousand dollars.
ME: Got it.
STRANGER: So all you have to do is sign right here….
ME: Holy…
STRANGER: Nate? Nate?!!?!
I laugh hysterically and run away.
